Improving your Public Speaking Skills: Part II
The Second A: ASK!
Now that we have appreciated the importance of awareness, what’s next? Simple, you ASK for feedback. That will be your second step in deepening your awareness of your public speaking skills. Yet this is a step that most people - read egomaniacs - have problem with. (grins)
If you find yourself reacting strongly or denying, you are one of them! Tear down your defense mechanism for a short while and see if this “know-it-all guy” (that’s me!) has something worth listening to. We are all self conscious people and naturally, in our right frame of mind, we would want to be complimented. And this isn’t a bad thing. It motivates you. It tells you what your audience likes. But if you plan to tune out to the criticism or suggestions your audience have for you, you are going to lose out in the long run. You will have no idea about your blindspots (see The First A: AWARENESS) and you have deprived yourself from taking your public speaking skills up another level.
So where should you start? Here’s something that I use frequently and it works very well for me. Try it for size!
BEFORE YOUR SPEECH
Get 2-3 trusted friends in your audience to evaluate your speech. (If you know no one, then make at least 1-2 friends before you go on stage. It is part of my “Confidence Booster” strategy which I will elaborate in another entry). Tell them that you are working on a few areas. Say slowing down your pace, adding a story, or practising dramatization. Anything. And ask them to be your eyes. Most importantly tell them to be honest. No patronizing (leave it to the rest of your audience). That’s why you got to trust them! You can ask for more eyes if you are comfortable. In my opinion, the more the merrier. If possible, find every chance to record your speech. Esp. if it is a humorous speech as you can judge the success by the intensity of laughters by your audience. And if you can videotaped your speech, even better!
And then proceed to do your thing!
AFTER YOUR SPEECH
Ask for feedback from your friends - tell them to be honest and objective. Did you manage to do the things you told them you will do? Did it work for you? How could you improve? How did they feel as an audience?
Ask for feedback from your audience as well. Ask them what they like and do not like about your speech. Tell them to be honest (if you sincerely don’t mind). And as they share with you their feedback, you can either take mental notes or jot them down. Here are some of the questions I will ask them. What do you think is my message? Is there anything unique about my speech? How could I improve? From an audience’s point of view, do you have any suggestions you have for me? Notice there are no negativity in my questions. Do that. Your audience will be more likely to be honest with you. Coz’ a question like “Do you think I have any weakness in my speech?” will often reap patronizing answers like “Of coz not. I love your speech!” And even if they do that, ask them what part of your speech do they like? Or why do they like your speech?
In short, go deep! Collect as much info as you can. This is going to be helpful in your third part when you take ACTION!
What I have shared with you only works if you go in with the mentality of wanting to be a better speaker. It is BS if you think there is nothing you can improve. Even the best speaker in the world can bring his speaking capabilities to greater height. And since you are not, there will always be room for improvement for you. (grins) Question is do you want to be better than your last performance? If so, change your attitude. Be fair to yourself - ask for feedback!
Feedback is the breakfast of champions.
The first thing top athletes do after an event is study the video and examine their technique. How did the start, the middle and the end of the event go? Their coach will probably watch it with them.
In speaking circles, we call this feedback evaluation. We highlight what went well and identify areas for improvement. Over a period of time, this process when delivered sensitively and honestly can produce exceptional results.
Go for it, get some honest feedback today…
Regards Vince
Right on Vince!
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